Napier Baptist

n.b. I'm going to come my haunting question for you, but you'll have to read on and be patient....

"A healthy desire to do well can spill over into a less than healthy need to achieve and a need to be liked." This was a comment made about me by a staff member in an annual review of me when I was training for ministry. Of all the things I was told at college I think it was the most accurate and the most helpful I recieved. It's opened up a massive can of worms for me that I'm still working through, but it's a hugely helpful comment for my own self-awareness. I am someone that puts an unhealthy value on what other people think of me. I'm working through it, but sometimes, out of fear of what people think of me, I do what's popular or take the path of least resistance so that I'll remain well liked instead of standing tall and doing or saying things I believe in. It is a crippling cycle of constant anxiety over whether I am liked or disliked, whether decisions I make, things I say are popular etc. It is an impending disaster for my ministry if I don't learn to unplug from this anxiety and make my peace with myself and God. I shared this anxiousness I have with a group of pastor friends on a weekend away. We had a college lecturer leading us for the weekend (the same one who had made the earlier comment about me when I was at college). The lecturer, someone I admire and totally trust, said that when he feels that sort of anxiety that stops him from doing or saying the things he believes in, he asks himself - "what would I do if I wasn't afraid?" and then he does that. That question has haunted me now for 3 months - "what would you do if you weren't afraid?"

So, what are your fears that are stopping you from doing or saying the things you believe in? And, what would you do if you weren't afraid?